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Candlelight vigil rallies against domestic violence |
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Wednesday, 14 October 2009 |
 Alex Arnold, top, Shelby Brooks and Josh Mendez, members of the Benton Mayor’s Youth Advisory Council, light candles in remembrance of 24 women and children who died as a result of domestic violence in Arkansas in 2008 during the annual Saline County Safe Haven Candlelight Vigil late Tuesday. Domestic Violence Awareness Month was observed Tuesday in Saline County with the annual candlelight vigil sponsored by Safe Haven, a facility that provides a refuge for victims of this crime.
The event drew a packed house at the Gene Moss Building, where the ceremony was moved from the Juli Busken Amphitheater because of inclement weather.
Included were displays of silhouettes and T-shirts honoring victims of domestic violence, guest speakers and emotionally charged testimony from a local police chief.
The building was filled with 24 silhouettes representing Arkansas women who died in 2008 because of domestic violence. Also included in the displays were 300 T-shirts depicting victims from the past 10 years.
The event was sponsored by the Arkansas Coalition Against Domestic Violence.
Bryant Police Chief Tony Coffman informed the crowd that he experienced domestic abuse as a child.
“I am a survivor of 10 years of living in a house with abuse,” he said. “I always asked myself ‘what did I do wrong?’”
Coffman said until he was 7, he was raised by his grandmother, whom he called the “light of my life.” After seven years, he said his biological mother and stepfather came back into his life. Though he did not know them, they gave him “basically anything I ever wanted” at first, but then they moved miles away Humnoke.
“My life changed,” he said. “It went on night and day. You couldn’t ever even sneak up on me, I’d hear just a pop and I’d wake up. I was a straight-A student when I lived with my grandma, but when I went to live with my stepfather, I failed — I couldn’t stay awake in school from the night before. I also learned that domestic violence makes you a liar. I went to school with bruises all the time, and I always made excuses for why I had them.”
Coffman said the abuse continued until he was age 17 and said if “he didn’t understand from age 7 up, you can bet none of these kids [in abused homes] can’t understand either.” He told the crowd that today there are a number of ways for someone living in an abusive relationship or home to get help. Coffman said between law enforcement and organizations such as Safe Haven, people can get help.
“It’s not your fault,” he repeated several times. “I had an assistant look up several statistics of domestic violence cases, but you know what? I didn’t see a zero anywhere on that list. One is too many and how many people do we not know about? Remember, it is not your fault and not your kids’ fault. We are just human and we don’t deserve to be run over.”
After receiving a standing ovation, numerous guest speakers read poems of women and children they helped. Julie Gunter and Debbie Tulley sang to the crowd and the Bauxite Mini-Miner cheerleaders performed a special cheer.
Amanda White, volunteer coordinator for Saline County Safe Haven women’s shelter, told the crowd that everyone in the community suffers when someone is a victim of domestic violence. She said, however, that a community can help save people from domestic abuse through education and by calling authorities or Safe Haven for help for their neighbors.
“Our goal is to raise awareness of the problem of domestic violence and also give the community knowledge of the different agencies and businesses in Saline County and what services are offered,” White said. “Women and children, even some men, often come to us with nothing. Sometimes they don’t even have shoes on their feet, but we help them get their lives back together.
“We also help them learn how to get past bad decisions,” she said. “Without community support though, we are nothing. Everything and anything donated to us, even just a 50 cent donation, helps.”
Other guest speakers included state Sen. Shane Broadway, D-Bryant; state Rep. Dawn Creekmore, D-East End; Benton Mayor Rick Holland; Saline County Judge Lanny Fite; Saline County Chaplain Tamra Gore; Saline County Sheriff Bruce Pennington; Saline County Prosecuting Attorney Ken Casady; Mayor’s Youth Council adviser Angela Ross; te Rev. Lorrie Slaymaker; and numerous members of Safe Haven.
Members of the (Benton) Mayor’s Youth Council lighted the candles in honor of fallen victims to domestic violence and the Benton High School JROTC presented the colors.
For more information about stopping domestic violence or the candlelight vigil, call Safe Haven at 315-7233 or e-mail
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